F*ck Covid! I miss home

Of all cities, the one I miss the most is Porto. My home in Porto. My family in Porto. My friends in Porto. My routines in Porto.

I miss...
... The smell of my flat...
... My large living room overlooking the avenue...
... Staying in bed seeing the seagulls...
... Walking to Petulia for breakfast or lunch or at any time of the day really...
... Walking to the fruit market...
... The beach...
... Walking in front of casa da musica...
... My mum, my dad... their food... their hugs... their plays with my daughter... 
... Travelling there and back without fear...

Home has been in Geneva and in Porto for the past 15 years... and it pains me not knowing when i will be able to go back... For now it remains... I am at home and I miss home.

Pre Covid travels and routines - NYC

Yesterday one of my friends texted me saying "she was happy she traveled so much before Covid and didn't wait to go to the places she wanted to go."

I agree... and me too. I have traveled the world and visited places way beyond my wildest dreams.
In the midst of remembering Thailand, India, China, Taiwan, Cape Verde, Tunisia, Mexico, Jamaica, USA, Canada, Cameroon, Dubai, Jordan, Norway, Hong Kong, Macau, Colombia, Brazil, Greece, Italy, Spain, Denmark, Netherlands, South Africa, UK, France and so many others... my mind goes to the routines i ended up having in some of these places...

... Normally the day I landed in NYC would be my "free day" (with exception of that one time where I landed, changed in the taxi and rushed to the UN just in time to speak)... I would check in at the hotel, where the receptionists already knew me, and then I loved walking to Time Square. Seating down and taking in all the loudness and lights of the city. I would then gather some energy to walk around, go shopping, buy way too much stuff mostly for my daughter, pick up some take away dinner and walk back to my hotel where i would have dinner in bed while watching re-runs of the big bang theory and fall asleep at 9 pm. I would be up at 4 am, tossing and turning, cursing the jet lag until i would get up and go for a run, pick up breakfast on my way back, eat it while talking to Europe, get ready and start the day and settle in the office before 8 am. I would do this for 3 or 4 days (normally adding business dinners, meetings and non-stop working), then rush to the airport where i would stock up on M&M supplies, board the plane where I would quickly fall asleep from exhaustion, feeling miserable and missing home. Last time I left NYC not knowing when i would be back... i guess none of us really knows that now....

It's OK

Sometimes my mind wants to give in to fear, to pain, to sadness, to panic brought on by uncertainty...  Breath and remember.... it's OK.

It's the first time we are living through something like this. It's the first my simulation exercises pass on to reality. It's the first time a health issue has caused so much caos in such short notice.

It's OK. Breath and remember... this is not permanent, it may feel permanent but it is temporary. It will pass and when it does, we will be able to manage whatever comes next.

While we are here... in this strange and scary moment in history ... make use of all coping mechanisms you need... This too shall pass 🌈

What i want post Covid-19 #3

I want to...

... Go to Madeira, watch whales, walk in beautiful gardens, eat delicious food, enjoy the sun, swim, order room service and let my daughter watch all cartoons she wishes
... Go to the Bains de Cressy
... Bring my daughter to her swimming class
... Go get a massage at a nice SPA
... Take some walks by the lake
... Have my family over
... Meet up friends for dinner at Luigia

What I want post Covid-19 #2

I want to ...

... Let my daughter play freely in all the playgrounds
... Have picnics and barbecues by the lake
... Hug my friends when i see them and stop this "hand over my heart" madness
... Go to all the restaurants and bars and ice cream shops
... Stroll through the airport and go on a plane without disinfecting my hands every 2 minutes
... Walk to the bakery and think only about the potential food poisoning i will get from the lady who gives me the bread with her naked hands (the same she uses for the coins and everything else). My body has good immunity to that...
... Have normal conversations that don't involve number of deaths, number of new cases, the fact that we are still 12 months away from a vaccine and nobody has a clue on how to scale up treatments (if ever they appear)

What i want post Covid-19: #1

I never thought i would live through such a pandemic in my lifetime. I ran multiple  pandemic simulations in the past 4 years and the results were always frightening: the world is not prepared. We are not prepared! So of course, i always hoped we were being prophets of doom and nothing so bad would ever happen. 

And now here we are... Europe is in lock down and we are all living the unimaginable "contagion". As hard/ destabilizing/ scary as these days have been, i don't want to focus on that... i want to keep me and my family going by repeating to myself "This is not permanent, it feels permanent but it is not! This too shall pass and we will be alright!"

With this in mind... i want to think about all the things i will do when these days are over...

- I want to go to Porto

- I want to hug my family

- I want to see my daughter play with our family 

- I want to go to the beach, explore rock pools and just enjoy the sun 

- I want to walk to Petulia, listen to a concert in Casa da Musica, and have grilled chicken for dinner

- I want to eat Francesinha and see my girl run up and down in Aliados 

- I want to go to Albufeira, smell the lavander and the pine trees, enjoy the outdoors heated pool and have dinner in the balcony of my hotel room 

Over 20 years have gone by...

On coming back to blogging...

I started this blog in December 2005 (it was on another website... but it was this blog)... 11 years ago. I was 25 years old and had just moved from Lisbon to Geneva for my dream job. I had an office just for myself overlooking the Jura mountain and had the near to infinite energy that only 25 year olds do. I was very sure of many things in my life... and i am so grateful  that life has proved me so wrong!

I would like to come back to blogging regularly, however life has been just too intense for anything else then living it...

I will give it a try, if nothing else, because i like reading what i write years after i wrote it.

Undignified moments of baby delivery

So... you've waited 40 weeks and the moment to deliver your baby is here. Everyone is psyched (yourself included) and all those happy and horror stories of other women's births are going through your mind until the first contraction hits and you know it is show time!

For all it's beauty and magic, labour is also filled with undignified moments nobody can really prepare you to... for example:

- Jack Nicholson moments: you will be walking around in a stupid hospital gown that is supposed to close on the back, but in-spite of your nakedness it remains open because the last thing you remember is to close up the stupid dress

- Can't touch this moments: almost everyone that enters the delivery room will have  to touch you in some way you don't want them to

- Poltergeist moments: you may scream and switch languages as if you were possessed by the multi language demon

- Waterfalls moments: you realize you have to pee, but there's no way the midwife will let you go to the bathroom

- Did they forget to take the second baby out moments: when you get up the next day and realize you still look like you are 7 months pregnant (Kate Middleton must be a real princess to come out f the hospital looking like she did)

There were other embarrassing moments... many others... but fortunately - thanks to all he hormones you are pumped with - your brain forgets.  That is definitely the best part... forgetfulness (which by the way will accompany you for all the weeks following the delivery).

Juntas ja...#4

Dancamos e saltamos ao som de Kate Perry emTianjin...
Fomos às massagens em Hong Kong, Porto, New Delhi e Geneve...
Fizemos mani pedis em NY e no Dubai...
Subimos os Aliados a andar tipo pinguim...
Subimos o Jura (de carro)...
Ficamos coradas e/ ou com calor em alturas absolutamente inapropriadas...
Tivemos que acabar conferencias telefonicas mais cedo - cramped bladder trumps any conversation!
Comemos gelados no Porto, Gaia, Londres, Davos, Bruxelas e Zurich...
Usamos a pregnancy card para nos esparramarmos em sofas e cadeiras em cafés, esplanadas e até reunioes...
Comemos oh so spicy noodles em NYC, e em Geneve, e em Hong Kong (basically every where cause spicy noodles are just too delicious!)...
Usamos a pregnancy card para nao ir a pé da Boavista ao Aliados na noite de ano novo...  
Dormimos muito muito muito...
Comemos demasiadas pipocas do Arrabida...
Vimos um Mad Max pela primeira vez...
Recebemos sorrisos empaticos de estranhas(os)....

Pah... que abuso!

Questiono-me se agora nos programas de MBA, negocios, empreendorismo, candidaturas a empregos  (e outros que tais) dizem às pessoas que é boa ideia porem nas cartas de motivaçao que falaram com alguem que trabalha no mesmo sitio para o qual se estao a candidatar....
Ja é a terceira ou quarta vez que isto me acontece:
1) alguém que esta interessado num emprego na mesma organizacao onde eu trabalho
2) encontram-me na vastidao da www
3) arranjam o meu email e mandam-me uma mensagem para saber mais sobre a organizacao e o programa de treino que esta oferece
4) eu respondo ao email e falo ao telefone com a pessoa (que nao conheco de lado nenhum, nunca vi mais gordo, nem sei nada sobre como trabalham)
5) as pessoas (que ja estavam convencidas antes que era um trabalho que queriam) ficam ainda mais entusiasmadas e candidatam-se
6) mandam-me um email a agradecer o tempo dispendido, as informacoes dadas e a INFORMAREM-ME que vao referir na carta de candidatura que falaram comigo!

Ora raios parta! Eu nao vos conheco de lado nenhum!!! Desde quando é que isto é aceitavel?!?!?
What the fuck?!?!

Esta estratégia de "pseudo name dropping" é fraca! e mais... se algum hiring manager se lembrar de me perguntar alguma coisa, provavelmente nao funciona em vosso favor!

Ide trabalhar e arranjam referencias decentes.... nao se aproveitem de quem foi prestavel e vos quis ajudar a tomar uma decisao informada!

True story

I am in the line at FNAC, one client is paying and two ladies are waiting to go before me. The cashier finishes the client, and before starting with lady n°1 turns to the 9 months pregnant  lady of the queue:

Cashier: - Excuse me madame, can i process your purchase?
Me:- Oh, yes please. Thank you so much.
Lady 1:- WHAT?! Why would you give her priority?
Cashier:- Because the lady is pregnant
Lady 1:- Oh... In my time no one ever did that. pfff
Lady 2:- Isn't it nice to see how much things have progressed since your time for the best?

And so i was allowed to pay my one item, and Lady 1 felt terribly inconvenienced for delaying her purchase for 3 minutes and wasting another 3 minutes protesting without any backing up from other people in the line.

O que faz falta... nao é so animar a malta...

Também me faz falta:
- 2 ou 3 golos de mojito antes do hamburguer
- correr à hora do almoço (ou ao final da tarde, agora que ja esta luz até tarde)
- comer mousse de chocolate e ovos moles
- comer salada directamente to pacote
- nao estar a cair de sono às nove da noite
- nao ter borbulhas como se tivesse 21 anos
- martinis bianco com gelo e limao ao final da tarde junto ao lago
-  subir escadas a correr
- baixar-me para apertar os sapatos
- apertar os casacos dos fatos
- sentar-me com as pernas fechadas
- cruzar as pernas
- passar despercebida em reunioes
- dormir de barriga para baixo

Juntas ja... #3

Passamos dias a preguiçar ao sol, no sofa, no cinema...

Comemos gaufres quentinhos em Bruxelas...

Tivemos momentos embaraçosos com conteudos estomacais...

Ouvimos conselhos de taxistas sobre gravidez, educação e amamentação...

Cantamos “c’mon baby light my fire” numa Starbucks em Zurich...

Ouvimos historias de terror dos partos de outras mulheres...

Andamos à neve, sol, chuva e vento...

Tivemos prendas e ofertas inesperadas...

Adormecemos obsescenamente cedo...

Binge watched House of Cards...

Descobrimos a amazon.com...

Juntas ja... #2

Estivemos uma semana na montanha mágica...
Comemos fondue de queijo...
Demos longas caminhadas junto ao lago...
Levamos visitas a andar de patins no gelo...
Fomos a Londres falar em publico...
Precisamos de ajuda para nos levantar do sofa...
Fizemos uma road trip da alemanha até casa de carro...
Apreciamos a orquestra da casa da musica na sala suggia...
Apanhamos com neve e muita bize...
Fomos nadar e ficamos a saber que ainda ha homens com barrigas maiores que a minha...